Show me Jesus

This morning’s sermon featured congregational participation. We reflected mostly on John 12:20-33, with a little of the new covenant from Jeremiah 31:31-34

I spent a good part of the last three days at a conference called Evangelism Matters, hosted at St Paul’s Episcopal Church in Cleveland Heights, and organized by the Evangelism Team of the Episcopal Church and Forward Movement. It was amazing: more than 400 Episcopalians gathered day after day to talk openly about evangelism! The Presiding Bishop was there, and the President of the House of Deputies, and many inspiring and informative people, one of our own parishioners included. Our own white church with the red doors was featured in word and image in one of the workshops.

More to the point, at a certain moment in the proceedings, I began to make the connection between what the speakers were saying – about telling our stories, about equipping one another for evangelism, about simply being real and being there for other human beings, those we are called to seek and serve as though they were Christ – I heard these messages and began to think about this time we have together, which led naturally to considering this morning’s gospel.

Jesus and his disciples were hanging around the outskirts of Jerusalem, waiting for the Passover to begin. Some Greeks – probably God-fearers, Greeks who knew and believed in the Almighty God – had heard about Jesus. They were curious, and a little afraid. One day, at the market or over dinner or sightseeing around the Temple, they fell into conversation with Philip, and quickly realized that this was someone who knew Jesus, someone with access to Jesus, someone who could introduce them to Jesus.

Too often, we seek that attitude of humility that denies that we have anything much to say, to offer, to one seeking Christ. But the fact is that we have everything that is needed. We have our own relationship with God, with Jesus, and we have one another. Philip was freaked out when the Greeks asked him to take them to Jesus, so he went right out and grabbed his brother for back-up. We have one another. We have a place and a community into which to bring our questioning friends, strangers, and Greeks. It’s ok not to know all of the answers. It’s ok to say, I don’t know, but sometimes I have found Jesus here, in the hymns, in the prayers, in the bread and the wine, in the solid shoulders of the person who sits in front of me on a Sunday morning.

Come with me, and I’ll show you.

You know what’s coming. Imagine that someone came to you, because they know from the coffee shop or from work or from walking the dog or from the bus that you go to a church, that you have some connection to Jesus. Imagine that they ask you, “Sir, sister, stranger, where can we find Jesus?” What would you tell them? What might you show them? Where would you take them? Who would you call for back-up?

*****

For Jesus, the approach of the faithful Gentiles was a sign that the hour was indeed coming, was upon him when the new covenant of God would be forged through his own body, through his own sacrifice. The covenant that Jeremiah talks about is one in which we will no longer need to show one another the way to God through Jesus, because we will all know, equally and fully, the heart that God has placed within us. We will be one with God and with one another. This was Jesus’ purpose, and the approach of the nations was his sign that it was time for him to be raised up, in order to draw all people to himself.

This was a hard lesson for the Greeks, no doubt, who had arrived at a crisis in the story, a moment of drama that transcended their curiosity. It was harder still for Philip and Andrew, watching their beloved Christ move closer to the cross. But after he had been lifted up, their hearts, Jewish hearts, Greek hearts, hearts drawn to God were filled with more wonder than they had ever imagined possible, and they saw, and they knew, and they told the story to all who would listen, that Jesus is alive.

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Seventeen

First published at the Episcopal Cafe: Speaking to the Soul

Seventeen.
Seventeen bodies.
Seventeen minutes.
In some places, they will wait longer: twenty minutes; thirty; because seventeen is too young to die; because they have had to grow old before their time; because there are too many more bodies.

Last week, the Episcopal bishops listened to a letter from the parents of a murdered child. They wondered aloud how many such messages they had missed:

We, the bishops of The Episcopal Church, wholeheartedly support and join with the youth in this call to action.
At the same time, we acknowledge that black and brown youth have continuously challenged the United States to address the gun violence that they and their communities are experiencing.  We repent that, as bishops, we have failed to heed their call. …
We will walk with the youth of the United States today and into the future in choosing life.

In biblical numerology – a fiery rabbithole – seventeen is the number of heads and horns of diabolical significance. It is the number of the day of the Flood.
But it also numbers the day on which the Ark came to rest, somewhere in the Ararat mountains.
Seventeen may choose its own significance.

When the Ark came to Ararat to roost, the journey was not over. The flood waters still covered the earth, consuming its breath; but life was ready to break the surface. After the waters had drained into the sky, the work of building a new civilization, renewing humanity’s stewardship of the life God had made for the world to live – that would be a work of trial, error, and repetitive, unrelenting redemption.

Seventeen is the seventh prime number: indivisible.
At ten o’clock on the fourteenth day of the third month of year two thousand eighteen of this portion of our history, twenty-eight days after seventeen of their generation died in one school, in one day, countless students will leave their classes, searching for one more word of covenant, one more promise of life redeemed from the chaos.

Pray for them, make way for them, make time for them, for they shall be called the children of God. (Matthew 5:9)

______________________________
Featured image: Hieronymus Bosch [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

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Idols made of metal

The people sowed poison, and harvested snake bites, piercing their bodies without warning, without mercy. The answer to death, dictated by the divine, was to set up a serpent of bronze.

Fast forward a few millennia, at the speed of a bullet, biting metal piercing bodies without warning, without mercy. So the people set up a shrine to firearms.

God did not instruct the people of the covenant to make an idol of the snake that bit them. God did not simultaneously offer the second commandment and command the people to shatter it. Graven images of metal do not divert anyone from the grave.

The bronze serpent was not an amulet, but an icon of futility; an emblem of the impotence of evil in the sight of a gracious God.

The modern casting would be an AR-15 made into a museum piece, rendered harmless, useless, toothless by its irrelevance, not empowered by false reverence.

God has never asked us to acknowledge idols, and if we do, they are liable to come back and bite us. But we know a better way.

“Deliver us from evil,” we pray, not to a serpent or a sidearm of bronze, but to the living God who will not allow death the first or the final, who will not allow the dealers of death to utter the decisive word.

________________

From Mount Hor the Israelites set out by the way to the Red Sea, to go around the land of Edom; but the people became impatient on the way. The people spoke against God and against Moses, “Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? For there is no food and no water, and we detest this miserable food.” Then the Lord sent poisonous serpents among the people, and they bit the people, so that many Israelites died. The people came to Moses and said, “We have sinned by speaking against the Lord and against you; pray to the Lord to take away the serpents from us.” So Moses prayed for the people. And the Lord said to Moses, “Make a poisonous serpent, and set it on a pole; and everyone who is bitten shall look at it and live.” So Moses made a serpent of bronze, and put it upon a pole; and whenever a serpent bit someone, that person would look at the serpent of bronze and live. (Numbers 21:4-9)

Jesus said, “Just as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in him may have eternal life.
“For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. (John 3:14-16)

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Sinners at the cross of angry Jesus

A sermon for the Third Sunday of Lent, 2018

How comfortable are you with angry Jesus? Last week, he practically spat and swore at Peter: “Get behind me, Satan!” This week, he is causing chaos and uproar in the Temple, whipping animals, shouting at people, making a mess, frightening the birds. Jesus is not afraid to experience the whole range of human emotion, including anger, including outrage, perhaps even outright rage.

Is that encouraging to you, or worrying? How comfortable are you with an angry Jesus?

It is easier, certainly, to be comforted by a Jesus who is angry with other people: cattle-drivers, money-changers. But when his disciples are also in the line of fire, then we get a little nervous.

Jonathan Edwards, eighteenth-century preacher of the Great Awakening, preached a famous sermon on Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God, during which he gave his opinion that,

Yea God is a great deal more angry with great Numbers that are now on Earth, yea doubtless with many that are now in this Congregation, that it may be are at Ease and Quiet, than he is with many of those that are now in the Flames of Hell.

While I would not care to live entirely within the world that Edwards’ theology constructs, it is no doubt true that if the Incarnation were to have chosen this moment in history to happen, instead of the last decades of the Jerusalem Temple, that twenty-first-century Jesus would have found plenty that needed cleansing, plenty that cried out for overturning, plenty that definitely wanted driving out of the temples of our lives, and our sacred and civil religion.

[Of course, if the Incarnation had been delayed until now, our entire history of the past two millennia would be different, so I understand that the comparison doesn’t quite work …]

Take the Ten Commandments. If we were to apply a letter grade to our adherence to the Mosaic Covenant, I do not like our chances of passing.

Have no other gods before me. How do you think we are doing with that one? If the proverbial alien landed in one of our cities today, what would they observe to be the object of our worship, our obedience, our religion? Would it be God, or a gun? Our Father, or a flag? Christ, or hard currency?

Do not make for yourselves idols.

You shall not make wrongful use of the name of the Lord your God. During these past difficult days, I heard a modern-day American preacher give his opinion that the guns to which we cling came not of human invention, but a special, unique, American dispensation direct from our Creator God, in whose presumably armed and armoured image we are made; the same God who said, “for your lifeblood I will require a reckoning”. If that is not blasphemy, then I have lost track of what the word means.

It also covers idolatry. Back to Jonathan Edwards:

Natural Men’s Prudence and Care to preserve their own Lives, or the Care of others to preserve them, don’t secure ‘em a Moment. …. But the foolish Children of Men do miserably delude themselves in their own Schemes, and in their Confidence in their own Strength and Wisdom; they trust to nothing but a Shadow.

It’s also worth noticing that if you add Preacher LaPierre’s special gun dispensation to a few choice Stand Your Ground laws, then you have the perfect get-out-of-hell free card to exempt you from Commandment #6, Thou shalt not kill; or at least for a portion of the population.

As Kelly Brown Douglas, eminent Episcopalian and Womanist theologian writes,

Stand-your-ground culture reveals a nation that is actually at war with itself.

It is a culture that appoints its own saviours and demons, and arms them to the teeth.

I’m not going to go through all of the Ten Commandments because frankly, unless we can reconcile our fundamental issues with the first three and the prohibition on killing, not to mention loving our neighbour, I do not see a way for us to achieve any kind of passing grade.

As Jonathan Edwards reminded his audience of miserable sinners in Massachusetts and Connecticut,

Sin is the Ruin and Misery of the Soul; it is destructive in it’s [sic] Nature; and if God should leave it without Restraint, there would need nothing else to make the Soul perfectly miserable. The Corruption of the Heart of Man is a Thing that is immoderate and boundless in its Fury.

Which leads me back to my opening question: How comfortable are we with angry Jesus? Because I think that we have plenty of fuel here for his fury.

Oh, but here comes the twist, that pretzel in the logic and justice of God that is the form of the Cross. Here is the madness that undermines our clever arguments and justifications, which renders our judgement questionable, which redeems and refines our confusion.

Jonathan Edwards would have us believe that God is holding us “over the Pit of Hell, much as one holds a Spider, or some loathsome Insect, over the Fire,” and Wayne LaPierre would have us take up arms against bad guys and sinners, but the way of the Cross makes a mockery of us all, and especially of preachers.

By way of the Cross, in God’s wisdom, instead of striking us down, or burning us up, God has decided to die for us, to offer up, to lay down life itself, so that we might recognize that the way back to Godliness is one of self-sacrifice, of immeasurable love.

Jesus is angry because he cares, to cite a cliche. He is angry because it matters to him what we do next: whether we suffer the little children to live; whether we beat our swords into ploughshares; whether we continue to sacrifice our doves of peace on the altars of the money changers, or not. He is angry because with the pretzel logic, the foolish wisdom of the Cross, he would rather die than watch us kill one another.

Here is the way of the Cross, which is foolishness to Americans, with its naïve non-violence, its disarming innocence. Here is the way of the Cross, which is a stumbling block to revolutionaries, with its radical redemption even of the unrighteous.

The way of discipleship, the one that follows Jesus to the Cross, admits that we make Christ angry more often than we should. It accepts his judgement, receives his rebuke, prays for his cleansing as part of our direction and redemption.

Sinners in the hands of a merciful God, we may not need to fear Christ’s anger, but we should pay it heed, because it is part of our training in the way of the Cross, the way of life and love.

When his disciples remember the scripture, “Zeal for my Father’s house will consume me,” they might as well be talking of the temples of our bodies. Jesus’ passion for us, and for our salvation, is burning him up, and, if we let it, his passion will burn away the chaff that keeps our souls from a clear view of God and of God’s will for the world, to live in peace with one another and in harmony with Christ.

Sinners in the hands of a merciful God, may righteous anger infect our hearts. May the wisdom of sheer foolishness bring us courage, and drive out our tendencies to disappointment and dereliction. May the stumbling blocks which bring us pause and bruise us cause us only to turn back to God, and to the way of the Cross to which Christ has called us. May the peace which passes human understanding fill our hearts and minds instead with the love of God, and of God’s Son our Saviour Jesus Christ. Amen.

____________

Jonathan Edwards, Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God, preached July 1741, at  https://digitalcommons.unl.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1053&context=etas

Wayne LaPierre at CPAC, February 22, 2018, via https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2018/02/wayne-lapierres-trumpian-base-strategy/553964/

Kelly Brown Douglas, Stand Your Ground: Black bodies and the Justice of God (Orbis Books, 2015) – in its entirety, a brilliant definition and indictment of the problem, and a hard but hopeful theological reflection on the redemption offered by the Crucified One

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Cleansing the temple

Christ, cleanse our temple courts
where money changes hands
to purchase  sacrificial lambs
offered on the high altar
hymned with thoughts and prayers
and the black sheep, tethered,
set aside for the devotions of
white-robed acolytes, while
mourners shuffle ceaseless intercessions
through a side door, out of sight

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St David’s

Sheer skyfall, blue to blue,
plumb-lined from the heavens to the deep
measures a cliff, eroded from creation,
where only dune-grass and sheep may grow,
miraculously rooted as the earth turns.

We set out on a narrow path
littered with diamonds until,
“Stop!”
Our mother recalled us to the peril, now set between us,
a black and gold serpent basking under the pitiless sun.

__________________

Image: Adder, by Mick E. Talbot, used under Creative Commons license via https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Adder.jpg

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Book Review: Raising White Kids, by Jennifer Harvey

Read to the end to find out how to win a free book! This giveaway is now closed.

At a recent conference on anti-racism and reconciliation, the man sitting next to me interrupted the speaker’s story about someone challenging her own racial identity to say, “You know, the problem is everyone’s got it wrong. There is no black and white. We’re all shades of beige.”

I had just begun reading Jennifer Harvey’s new book, Raising White Kids: Bringing Up Children in a Racially Unjust America, including a chapter that addresses the myth of color-blindness as a salve to this country’s racial woes. For a moment I considered offering up my spare copy, but I really wanted to hear the rest of what our speaker had to say. The moment passed.

Harvey’s book is addressed to the parents of white children negotiating a world in which they have an inherited privilege which she identifies also as a burden:

“White supremacy malforms my humanity, constrains my life, compromises my spirit. When I recognize this I begin to see the fight against racism as also a life-giving struggle for my own liberation.” (p. 118-9)

Part of the problem of teaching anti-racism to white parents, white children, white people like me is that balancing act that wants to reassure and retain the interest and cooperation of the white reader, while addressing the real and everyday enactment of racism within which we live. Hence the adoption of images such as “a life-giving struggle for my own liberation.” I might, as a preacher, indeed speak of liberation from the sin of racism as life-giving; but the fact is that as a white person, I have never been literally enslaved, imprisoned by racism; the liberation language in this context leaves me a little uneasy.

That the balancing act itself feels weighted is a symptom of how difficult and deeply rooted the problem of racism is, and how dangerous it can feel to address it. Even this approach of teaching white parents how to talk about race to their children feels like a stealth move actually designed to educate the adults on their own blind spots and sins of omission in becoming anti-racist. Harvey acknowledges this, reporting,

“Many parents today were raised either in families in which explicitly racist teachings were present, or in which teachings about equality were present but adults did not model antiracist interventions when racism reared its head. Many of us, thus, share a racial development journey. We have further growing to do ourselves.” (p. 132-3)

On the other hand, that makes this book useful beyond the parenting bookshelf. Educators, youth leaders, mentors, allies, as well as adults questioning their own conceptions of racial identity and complicity in social racism will recognize scenarios and find helpful material here.

Harvey has plenty of useful things to say to parents and others wondering how to shift their conversation around race from optimistic color-blindness to realistic anti-racism. She offers anecdotes throughout – things that children say that stump their parents and teachers – and runs scripts on how one might talk through a younger child’s conclusion from a Black Lives Matter protest that, “We’re white, so we’re safe,” or an older child’s concern that, “If I’m white, does that make me racist?” Or my own child’s question, a couple of decades ago, trying to puzzle out which one of their classmates I was talking about: “Is she one of the brown children?”

Harvey very gently addresses the issue of “white fragility,” suggesting that the best way to build a healthy identity as a white child is to teach a positive and engaged anti-racism.

Harvey’s prevailing premise is that children notice not only colour, but social scripts around colour, and that unless those social scripts, informed and underwritten by a sacred tradition of white supremacy, are specifically and critically deconstructed, they will remain the norm for yet another generation of American children. While that seems almost common-sense simple on the surface, learning how to address children’s questions, observations, and concerns around racial identity without anxiety is still hard for many of us raised “not to notice” difference.

When my children were very young, we lived in Singapore. One attended a local nursery. I did not realize the need explicitly to address my child’s experience of racial difference in that context until one day a new group of European children joined after their old school closed. That day, my child came running out of school with great excitement, yelling, “Mummy! Mummy! There’s someone at school who looks like me!”

Children notice. Children question, and, Harvey observes, unless we can entertain their honest puzzlings about race and racism as frankly and intentionally as we talk with them about any other aspect of their bodies, relationships, and communities, we will be letting them down.

As Harvey writes,

“We are a nation in crisis. Creating a different future requires that we tell the truth about that … We can and must push back against the silence that pressures us to raise our white children to be good people and just hope for the best. Going in, challenging taboos, speaking against racial dynamics, being brave not only impacts the world we live in, it teaches and equips our children to do the same.” (p. 290)

If you are up for it – creating a different future – this book may provide a useful and helpful standing start.

This review is based on a publisher-provided copy of the book. If you would like to win a free copy of Harvey’s book, Raising White Kids: Bringing Up Children in a Racially Unjust America, leave a comment below. A winner chosen at random will be contacted to receive a second copy provided to the reviewer by the publisher, Abingdon Press. Contest closes March 2nd, 2018.

This giveaway contest is now closed.

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Their cross, our cross

A sermon for the Second Sunday in Lent, 2018, at St Bartholomew’s Episcopal Church, Mayfield Village, Ohio

When Jesus said, if anyone would be my disciples they must deny themselves, take up their cross, and follow me, it was a while before anyone considered the cross a sign of salvation (to say the least).

When Jesus said, “take up your cross,” no one wore crosses around their necks, or cast them out of gold and precious metals. There were no processions of gilded crosses through city streets, followed by hymn-singing children and choirs, their way scented by incense.

When Jesus told the crowd, if anyone would be my disciple they must deny themselves, take up their cross, and follow me, the only people carrying crosses were condemned criminals, enemies of the Roman empire.

Before and until Jesus’ resurrection, and for many people even after it, the cross was a sign of resistance, of insurrection, but most consistently and certainly of suffering, pain, and death.

No wonder Jesus anticipated resistance to his words: those who are ashamed of my words; but he was adamant in his interpretation of God’s will for his disciples: Get behind me, Satan! he told his closest friend and follower. He was ashamed of Peter’s shameful response to God’s plan of salvation.

Peter was afraid, as well he might be. No one wanted to get crucified. No one would willingly seek out the pain and terrible torture of that death. There were those who would risk it, for violent insurrection that might just, if they killed enough Romans, make a difference … Barabbas, the man whose cross Jesus took in that prisoner exchange on the Pavement negotiated between Pilate and the crowd – Barabbas was one such revolutionary.

But Jesus wanted to go in without even so much as a sword or a club. He wanted to take on the establishment with nothing but love, righteousness, and the will of God to sustain him. He was resigned to the cross, but he considered it the price of salvation, of doing the righteous thing.

*

I have been trying to imagine how the words of Jesus to the pre-resurrection people would have sounded. We cannot hear of the cross without spiritualizing it, sublimating it post-resurrection. To have the same impact today as he had on that crowd in first-century Galilee, what might Jesus say?

He would not tell us to take up a flag, because the cross was not a rallying cry, nor a point of pride.

He would not tell us to take up a gun, because the cross was not a weapon that an individual could wield, but an instrument of the empire’s oppression; although if you want to go there, remember that the only people carrying it were those condemned to die by it.

He would not tell us take up a petition, because he was not asking anyone’s permission to change the world.

Addressing a crowd of undocumented immigrants, he might tell them to have their bags packed before following him.

Addressing a crowd of high schoolers, he might tell them to expect their suspension notices in the mail, as they follow him out of class with their hope and their protest signs.

Addressing a historically Black church – I hesitate to speak this aloud, but I think that it gets to the tone of what Jesus told the crowd in first-century Galilee – he might tell them to take up their rope, their noose, and follow him.[i]

That is what he was risking, defying the world order that fears death and cowers to power. This is the warning he was offering to the crowd. And if anyone is ashamed of my words, he told them, shame on you.

*

The call of the gospel, as we hear it in this Lenten season, is not only to believe and to be saved. That is the promise, and the prize. It is God’s saving grace and magnificent mercy towards us. But if we want to take full advantage of it, if we want to enter the heart of God, to live more fully into our creation as images of God, then we need to follow Jesus.

“Repent,” he said, “for the kingdom of God is at hand.”

Turn towards righteousness, for it is closer than we think.

The righteousness we seek is summed up in the law and the prophets and by Jesus: love God with all your being, and your neighbour as yourself. The way of the cross does not seek out trouble, but that loving righteousness, that righteous love, and will not be deterred by any obstacle set in its way.

Whether it is kneeling in prayer instead of standing for an anthem; whether it is refusing to profit from gun dealers and their promoters; whether it is speaking out for families whose desire is for food security, or simply to stay together; or for students whose desire is to live without fear;

there is often a cost to doing the right thing, regardless of the systems that surround us, and that is what we call our cross.

But we are privileged, those of us who stand on this side of the resurrection. Because we hear Jesus’ challenge and we know, we know how the story of his cross ends. It is not discouraged by suffering. In the garden, he prays it through, makes the decision to stand with courage, to continue in the way of the cross even unto death. He demands peace from his followers even in the hour of his arrest; he will not let violence enter his heart, nor be deterred by the corruption of the cross-makers. He is not defeated even by death.

Righteousness will prevail. The kingdom of God is closer than we think. Take courage, then, for the way of the cross, follower of Jesus, is the way of life, of righteousness, of peace, and it will lead us home to the very kingdom of heaven, the heart of God.

Amen

[i] For more on this, see James H. Cone, The Cross and the Lynching Tree (Orbis Books, 2013)

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“Startled” is putting it mildly

I don’t usually feature guest columnists on this blog, but when the highest offices in the land began mumbling and musing over the idea of arming teachers as a solution to our gun violence problem, I thought of my dad. So I asked him what he thought.

Alan McNee writes:

One blessing of old age is that, by definition, I am immune to early death and I am able to view the world with a relaxed detachment. I don’t lack comfort, and I can feel confident that I have played my part according to my abilities. I can reflect on my life’s experiences, good and bad, in the hope that I can categorise my feelings into some sort of order.

After school I was conscripted into the army, when National Service was compulsory. Then, newly qualified, I spent my entire teaching career in just three schools in England and Wales. At the time I retired I was Headmaster of a medium sized comprehensive school. I was a proud father and a loving husband.

I mention all of this because I am able to consider Donald Trump’s suggestion that teachers in school should carry weapons, recalling my roles as a soldier, an educator and a parent.

So, back to categorised feelings. This one fits very neatly under the heading “Startled”. I have been trying to imagine the situation where I am confronted by a madman with automatic weapon:-

  1. Where is my weapon stored?
  2. Who has the key to the cabinet?
  3. Is the ammunition in the same place?
  4. Is this weapon a match for the automatic wielded by the assailant?
  5. Will I do any collateral damage?
  6. Will I later face legal repercussions?
  7. Will the experience ruin my relationship with my students? And their parents?
  8. How will it affect my own family and domestic situation?
  9. Above all – Am I ruthless enough mentally to command the situation?

No wonder this Presidential “knee-jerk” startles. My advice to you Donald – let’s keep this idea of yours in the category where it belongs: “Computer Games”.

I am, like many others, in awe of the young people who have risen up from their own grief and trauma to confront the issues presented by our sea of guns head-on; the brave students of Parkland, Florida, their forerunners in Chicago and elsewhere across the country, my own young adult children who grace me with their wisdom and leadership.

As it turns out, we can still learn something from our parents, too.

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A perfectly imperfect marriage

A homily commemorating John Henry Newman, at Trinity Cathedral, Cleveland, February 21, 2018

John Henry Newman spent his life pursuing the peace that this world cannot give. He tried to find it in the church, but even there it seems that he was disappointed. He is celebrated as some kind of martyr in the Roman Catholic church, after his conversion to their flock, and as some kind of lost sheep savant by the Anglicans. He was a man of deep and tormented faith, and of profound intelligence, but he was not what might call happy. He was a perfectionist, and can anyone, living this life, prefer perfection and find any lightness of being?

I love that the first reading chosen for John Henry is a love song, because I think that it is love that he was pursuing all that time, love that he longed for in his quest for perfection, completeness, soul-satisfaction.

When his father died, John Henry wrote in his diary,¹

When I die, shall I be followed to the grave by my children? my Mother said the other day she hoped to live to see me married, but I think I shall either die within a College walls, or a Missionary in a foreign land – no matter where, so that I die in Christ.²

I think John Henry was lonely, and that Christ was as much his consolation as his committed husband.

He approached his ordination like a wedding, with excitement and dread, with joy and cold feet. He wrote one day,

As the time approaches for my ordination, thank God, I feel more and more happy … Let me, living or dying, in fortune and misfortune, in joy and sadness, in health & Sickness, in honour and dishonour, be Thine

but the very next day, the day before he was ordained, he wrote,

Now, … how hard my heart is, how dead my faith. I seem to have an unwillingness to take the vows, a dread of so irreparable a step, a doubting whether the office is so blessed, the Christian religion so true

and after the event,

I feel as a man thrown suddenly into deep water.

*

Upon my bed by night I sought him whom my soul loves;
I sought him, but found him not; I called him, but he gave no answer,

as the Song of Solomon says.

*

I was first introduced to Newman as one of the leading lights of the Oxford Movement, a revivalist movement in the Church of England, not to be confused with revivalists of the evangelical stripe. These were men (all men) who wanted to reform the Church of England, to purify it, to remove it from worldly and political concerns to a place of pure holiness and worship, untainted by impure Puritanism or superstitious Papism. The church should be, Newman considered, a place removed from this world, having more in common with the worshippers around the throne of heaven than with the passers-by outside its own doors. He wrote in one sermon,

Heaven then is not like this world; I will say what it is much more like, – a church. For in a place of public worship no language of this world is heard; there are no schemes brought forward for temporal objects, great or small; no information how to strengthen our worldly interests, extend our influence, or establish our credit. These things indeed may be right in their way, so that we do not set our hearts upon them; still (I repeat), it is certain that we hear nothing of them in a church. Here we hear solely and entirely of God. We praise Him, worship Him, sing to Him, thank Him, confess to Him, give ourselves up to Him, and ask His blessing.³

The problem, Newman found, was that the world simply would not leave its boots at the church door. It insisted on trampling its hobnailed problems across the pews and even echoing over the altar. He retreated further from conflict, fleeing the Reformation back to Rome, in case he should find it further removed from the day to day arguments and intrigues that beset all cities, all communities, all lives. He found himself a missionary, as he had predicted, but not to foreign parts, burned by sun and dust, but to the modern industrial desert of the English midlands, where the mines and the  factories pressed poetry out of men’s souls, and soot marked the cities year round, and not only on Ash Wednesday. I do not know that he found it an escape. He did find more controversy, when the Pope decided to become infallible, a decision which Newman, in a rare moment of diplomacy, declared, “inopportune.”

Nevertheless, he was true to his new vows, his eternal husband, his Christ. He continued to seek consolation, perfection, the companionship of his spirit for which he yearned.

“I will rise now and go about the city, in the streets and in the squares;
I will seek him whom my soul loves.”
I sought him, but found him not.

*

Here is the problem: John Henry was right. The church needs, we need the church to be a retreat from the chaos and conflict of the world, a sanctuary for the troubled spirit, a balm for the sin-sick soul, salvation for the sorrowful. Our worship, such as we find on these Wednesday evenings, elevated by pure voices and artful light, is an oasis. It is respite. It is a relief to find ourselves lifted up to heaven along with our prayers.

But we do not take our boots off at the door. We cannot hang up our skin with our coats. We may not be unfaithful, commit adultery against our everyday lives and sneak off in secret to meet up with God. We will remain divided, unsatisfied, lonely unless we are able to love God with our whole lives, and to bring our whole lives to worship around God’s throne. That will mean, in this life, accepting imperfection in the separation of church and the scandalous state of being that surrounds us.

It is the very message of the Incarnation that this is not only possible, but desirable in our relationship with Christ. God’s own self chose the imperfect marriage of the sacred and the profane as the most perfect way of salvation for God’s children.

*

Scarcely had I passed them, when I found him whom my soul loves.
I held him, and would not let him go
until I had brought him into my mother’s house.
and into the chamber of her that conceived me.

And so it turns out that Christ and the church, worship and the world, love and labour God and grime is the marriage made in heaven that we consummate on earth, to the satisfaction of our bodies and souls, a welcome companion on the lonely quest for perfection.

__________________________________________________

¹ John Henry Newman quotes were all found in Love’s Redeeming Work, compiled by Geoffrey Rowell, Kenneth Stevenson, and Rowan Williams (Oxford University Press, 2001), 402-411

² This and the following diary entries from John Henry Newman, Autobiographical Writings, ed. Henry Tristram (London, 1956), 200-221, quoted in Love’s Redeeming Work

³ John Henry Newman, Parochial and Plain Sermons, Vol. I (London, 1875), 1-14, quoted in Love’s Redeeming Work

Biblical quotations are from Song of Solomon 3:1-4

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